i was originally going to lolla for three days

that turned into one day

now i most likely won’t be going at all

way to ruin my summer lolla

tea day 3

(via fasciner)

skinnysummer-love:

so cute i can’t stand it

utopiaaaaaaaaaaaaa

(via showyourface)

nora and her tea day 2

new tea from work

math

and gov papers

…

i may never sleep tonight.

i have tried to write what i am thinking for the past 20 minutes. i write a sentence and erase it, i write a paragraph and i erase it. I can’t put it into words the way i am feeling at this exact moment. I am not only scared about every little part of my future, but i’m also not sure if i made the right choices. 

I am scared of walking in my heels tomorrow.

I am scared of being with a boy this summer.

I am scared to be without him.

I am scared to say goodbye to my friends at the end of the summer.

I am scared to make new friends.

I don’t know if I should be going to the school that I chose for the next four years: i look online at the school and i see all of the people that are going next year and i don’t want to be like any of them. They all seem like the cookie cutter college student who loves country music, dubstep, or “i love all music” types. They are cheerleaders, or like sports or have every possible stereotypical characteristic and i feel like i can’t relate to. I wouldn’t call myself any one thing, so that might be why i don’t see myself being friends with them.

I saw a commercial online for New Hampshire University. I have never been to New Hampshire, it interested me, i wanted to see something new and be far away from every that i know just so i could get change. I may just be vulnerable though.

I am probably over thinking shit and just have a huge fear of leaving everything that i know and love, but i don’t know what to do. It is all happening so fast and i can’t deal with it.

I just want this week of stress and work to be over, so i can work two jobs and be stressed all summer. Then i will start at the new college that i may or may not love. then be stressed out about school work and keeping my GPA so i can keep my scholarships.

or

I will do wonderfully on my tests and work will be easy, and i will get time off of work to relax and have an amazing summer with my beautiful friends and a cute boy that i want. It will be bittersweet to leave, but i will find my niche in school and friends that suit me. And 

And maybe.. I will finally be fulfilled and happy. 

Just, maybe.

(via fuckyeah-lollapalooza)

Secret spots

darksilenceinsuburbia:

Takeshi Suga.

http://www.flickr.com/people/sugarcrisp/

i want something new and different, but i am scared to change anything.

all i know is that i am unhappy.

this is supposed to be the best time of your life.

but this no where close.